BUGS AND OTHER LIFE FORMS
by D.
Bugs, bugs, bugs. I think Vietnam held the patent on weird creatures big and
small. It had mosquitoes, leeches, flies, worms, beetles, spiders, centipedes, and assorted
critters no one had ever seen before. Not to mention the plants that glowed in the dark.
One of my earliest experiences was with a spider. I had only been in country for
about a month. I opened my eyes one morning, wondering why my vision was
obstructed. There were these dark lines, like the fingers of a black hand, running across
my field of vision. I unconsciously brushed my hand over my eyes, and knocked the
biggest spider I have ever seen from my face.
The furry bugger had decided to take a little nap on my face while I slept. He
must have been 9 or 10 inches across. The dark lines that I had been looking through
were his legs. Apparently, it was harmless, but it still managed to scare me shitless. I
was not accustomed to insects the size of dinner plates.
Later, while posted at ASP (Ammo Supply Point #1), I would run into one of his cousins. I was sitting on
watch with my left arm resting on the top of the sandbag wall of the bunker. It was hot,
as usual, and I had my sleeves rolled up. I suddenly felt something crawling along my
arm. I looked down to see what appeared to be an African Chief’s tiger tooth necklace.
You know, one tooth facing up, the other down. This necklace was walking across my
arm. Only for a moment. I jumped up, freaked out, and chambered a round in my M-14
as I shook this example of the stone age off of me. The noise woke Roberts as I was
starting to seriously consider shooting that monstrous bug. He sat up and looked at the
thing on the bunker floor and said it was a centipede. It was like no centipede I’d ever
seen before and I wanted nothing further to do with it. I kicked it out of the bunker while
Roberts laughed.
Our early patrols almost had us shooting up the landscaping. That is until we
grew used to the fact that this country had PLANTS that glowed in the dark, like a
luminous watch dial. You could walk down a trail and see these faint greenish glows up
ahead, off to the sides of the path. Until you saw patches of them a few times and felt
them to make sure they were real, it was spooky. You felt like you were walking the
moors, in some Hollywood movie, with the Wolf-man getting ready to howl not far off in
the distance.
The final insult that the bugs gave me was to turn me into a Gook. I woke up one
morning and while shaving, I noticed that my eyelids had puffed up and the folds in them
had disappeared. The swelling had also slanted my eyes. I finished shaving and went up
to see the Corpsman. When I showed him my eyes he said, “Yeah, there’s a lot of that
goin’ around.” I gave him a dirty look and said, “Very funny, but what the hell caused
it?” He told me that he was serious about there being a lot of it. He had been seeing a lot
of cases, probably caused by insect bites. He gave me some antibiotics and said that the
swelling would probably go away in a day or so. It did, but in the interim, I was the
Battalion’s resident Caucasian Gook.
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Entomophagy sounds like the best solution.
Too funny! Two words—Banana Spider.
Yeah, but what do you use as a “Sheepdog” to wrangle them.
Harry, only you could come up with a comment like this on such an off the wall story.
I’ll leave the insect entrees to my chickens. Regards, D.
Great passage. Very engaging. Thanks for sharing.
D,
My pit bulls seem to round up every nasty critter thay can find and leave it (abused, but often still living) on my porch. Let me see if they are up to herding centipedes.
My oldest cousin was in Udorn (1972ish). He told stories of having a unit zoo consisting of various bugs such as you describe.
BTW, it’s a pleasure to have one’s singular talents recognized. Really, it was a good post. Keep them coming.
medic 66-67 Nam. Good post. Got me thinking (not always a good thing :)). You said M14 we must have been there about the same time. Welcome home!
Theoldman:
Yeah that venerable old bangstick dates me. I transitioned from the M14 to M16 around the end of 67 just before I went to a Gun Co. and life with a 1911 and greasegun and amtracs full of Chicom toys. Same to ya Doc!!!
Regards, D.
D, one of the good things about being a SeaBee was we got to swab the hootch floor with diesel fuel twice a week, it realy did keep the bug populatin down, John.
Oh wow D ~ dish size spiders ~ gave me the eebie jeebies 🙂 I’d jump a yard too but then my curiosity would have me looking it over ~ friend or foe? Thank you for that insight. My first experience w oversized bugs was living in Maui. One morning I woke up, with my mate tapping me on my shoulder to turn over, but as I turned over, I saw he was across the room. Upon closer inspection what tapped me on my shoulder was still there and it was a roach the size of a thumb! Ahhh ~ even small size bugs had me rechecking where I walked and what may be sleeping in my bed that wasn’t welcome. As its Hawaii, I often walked around barefoot, not after I tried to pick up a stray black string that was on the floor; that supposed string, lifted its tail and was ready to strike my fingers. A scorpion! Everywhere one lives, there’ll be some sort of bug, critter etc ~ always best to investigate what’s in your area and if it may be friend or foe.
John:
The removal of Smoktechs comment makes it appear that I am suffering from some type of dementia.
Regards, D.
D.
Comment? What comment? You might want to go get checked out 🙂
Rourke