Weapons against zombies……..

Zombies irritate me. It’s always in the middle of the night they come scratching on a window. Sometimes its while I am out grilling burgers when they come around with an half an eye hanging out of their head. Jeessh…..show some respect.

They also are not good listeners. I mean…..try to ask them to politely leave?…..vacate the property? – they just don’t cooperate. Well – sometimes they just have to be persuaded.

So – in case you haven’t had to deal with visits from roving gangs of impolite un-dead – figured I would throw some ideas your way on how to deal with them.

Kill ’em.

Yup – that’s it. Just kill ’em. Simple huh?

Well – the fun part is the “How” really. Lets go over some basic tools-of-the-zombie-killin’-trade.

1. Shotgun – Pretty much any 12 gauge pump will work. Make sure you have extra shells in-case a zombie football team shows up. Blasting them in the head takes them out with one shot – though it is fun to see their reaction when they loose a leg.

 

2. Machete – Just in case you are don’t have your shotgun or another firearm – a machete can work wonders. Make sure it is sharp and hack away just under the jaw bone. Watching that head roll……priceless.

 

how to bug in
3.  Ax – Oh yea! Nothing like the wind-up and final over the shoulder swing and that feel of the blade hitting the “sweet spot”  – just makes your day!

 

4. Nunchuku – One of the favorite weapons of the late Bruce Lee – the nunchuku can be a force to wreck havoc on the walking dead. A full swing can generate enough force to smash a concrete cylinder block. With that in mind – a zombies head should be no problem.

 

5. Good ‘ole FIRE – Some of the really big and slow zombies are perfect targets for Fire. Chuck some diesel or regular gas on them and light ’em up.

 

6. Large caliber bolt action rifle – Long range shots can be fun and require a good rifle and scope. Just be aware that if there is a crowd of un-dead in the distance shooting will bring them in closer.

 

 

alright…….here is the ultimate zombie weapon…...

A truck!!

Run them over!!

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7 Comments

  1. Ha! Good stuff!

    I sometimes think the term “zombies” is a term that is used as a metaphor for the people who are unprepared.

    One item that never seems to get a lot of play on prepper/survival sites is the bow and arrow or crossbow. Would you ever consider doing something on that Rourke? I myself own a bow and a crossbow and find that would be a very useful tool when the paradigm shifts….or when the SHTF. Just a thought.

    Great stuff as always.

    • Ben –

      I am very interested in getting a bow or crossbow myself.

      Amazing how expensive all that stuff is nowadays.

      Thanks – Rourke

  2. Being a girl, I favor the rifle, I don’t much care for the idea of up close and personal. However, your very salient point of “Just be aware that if there is a crowd of un-dead in the distance shooting will bring them in closer.” causes reconsideration. I have shot a compound bow but it didn’t have the range of the Remington 700 military sniper rifle. I am inspired to investigate the performance of cross bows. Furthermore, maybe I can reuse the ammo.

    • Pam –

      I like the idea of a crossbow or bow. Just be aware that sometimes the broadheads can get caught in the zombie’s eye socket – making it difficult to remove.

      Rourke

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