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Is Chuck Norris the Ultimate Survivalist?

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I have been following Chuck Norris’s career since I was a youngster.  Whether battling evil ninja’s, radical terrorists, or chemically induced immortal psychopaths – Chuck kicks butt.

Chuck Norris continues to be a legend in the martial arts world. He has attained an almost God-like status due to his being an  all-knowing, over-powering super-being. Some doubt his skills and abilities. Some doubt his credentials as a Texas Ranger. Some get their butt kicked.

So – is Chuck Norris the ultimate survivalist? Let’s look at a few “facts”:

• Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
• They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn’t take s**t from anybody.
• Chuck Norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and Mister Miyagi from Karate Kid.
• Scientists in Washington have recently conceded that, if there were a nuclear war, all that would remain are cockroaches and Chuck Norris.
• Aliens do exist. They’re just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.
• Ghosts sit around campfires and tell Chunk Norris stories.
• Some magicians can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
• When Chuck Norris plays Pac-Man the ghosts stay in their box.
• Chuck Norris once got bit by a rattlesnake. A few days later after much pain and suffering……. the rattlesnake finally dies.
• Some people sleep with a gun under their pillow. Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

Now – some of you may question why a post such as this shows up on a survival & preparedness blog. Well – let me ask you this simple question – If you found yourself in a survival situation – would you rather have an AK-47 or Chuck Norris.

I am sure you see my point, huh?

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